I am not. okay

jenny nuo

Compositor: Jenny Wang

I walked alone to the telephone
Now I'm overanalyzing this familiar dial tone
Wondering if I should change myself today
Or if I should stay out of everybody's way
And it's just crazy how much I try to change me
Because when you're bound by expectations, how can you be set free?
Maybe I'm addicted to the feeling of being liked by everyone
And I know that I chose to mirror those around me
But at the end of the day
I'm not anyone
And I'm not insane
But I am not impressed
Maybe I should rest
Maybe I should admit that I am not. Okay

I'm isolated at this party
Trying to guess what they're all thinking of
I have a tendency to assume
That deep inside their hearts, is a burning, raging hatred for my gut

And it's just crazy how much I try to change me
Because when you're bound by expectations, how can you be set free?
Maybe I'm addicted to the feeling of being liked by everyone
And I know that I chose to mirror those around me
But at the end of the day
I'm not anyone
And I'm not insane
But I am not impressed
Maybe I should rest
Maybe I should admit that I am not. Okay

And all I crave is validation
Wish that I could just be sober
Why do I have to be hated?
Wish this nightmare could be over
Wish you knew me before you judged me
Wish that we could just be friends
But instead it's all discarded
Before we even had a chance
And I try to pretend it isn't killing me slowly

Maybe I'm addicted to the feeling of being
Liked by everyone
And I know that I chose to mirror those around me
But at the end of the day
I'm not anyone
And I'm not insane
But I am not impressed
Maybe I should rest
Maybe I should admit that I am not. Okay